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Technology has transformed how families stay connected across distances. FaceTime, Zoom, Google Meet, and other video platforms let parents and children maintain relationships even when they can’t be physically together. But for years, family courts treated virtual visitation as a nice supplement to in-person time—not as genuine parenting time that counts in custody arrangements. In 2026, that’s changing. Virtual calls can now officially be counted as parenting time, opening new possibilities for custody arrangements and raising important questions about how technology fits into family law.
At Hepner & Pagan, we help families in the Campbell and Santa Clara County area navigate modern parenting arrangements. This shift toward recognizing virtual visitation reflects the reality of how families actually parent today. Let’s explore what’s changed, when virtual time counts, and how to include it properly in custody orders.
The Evolution of Virtual Visitation in Family Law
For two decades, family courts acknowledged that technology could help parents stay connected to children between in-person visits. A parent deployed overseas could call their child. A parent with a job in another city could video chat regularly. But courts treated these connections as supplemental—nice additions to the real work of parenting, which happened in person.
The reasoning was understandable but increasingly outdated. Courts worried that too much emphasis on virtual time might replace in-person visits or allow parents to avoid genuine parenting responsibilities. They also questioned whether video calls really constituted meaningful parenting time. Can you actually parent through a screen? Can you enforce rules, provide comfort, or build deep connections without physical presence?
But research increasingly shows that the answer is more nuanced. Virtual interaction can facilitate genuine parenting, particularly for certain activities. A parent helping a child with homework via video chat, reading bedtime stories, attending virtual school events, or having meaningful conversations—these are legitimate parenting activities.
The 2026 updates recognize this reality explicitly. Virtual visitation can now be incorporated into custody orders as official parenting time, subject to certain conditions and limitations. This is significant for many families.
When Virtual Time Counts as Parenting Time
Not every video call counts as official parenting time. Courts distinguish between incidental contact—a parent texting a child, having a brief video call—and structured parenting time that involves genuine parental responsibility. Virtual parenting time that counts toward custody orders typically requires:
Scheduled, Regular Communication. The time must be predetermined and reliable, not sporadic. If a parent is supposed to have virtual parenting time Tuesday and Thursday evenings at 7 PM, that’s official parenting time. Random video calls don’t count.
Focused Parent-Child Interaction. The video time should involve genuine engagement between parent and child. A parent letting a child watch while they work, or video chatting passively while doing other things, doesn’t meet the standard. The parent should be actively engaged, focused on the child.
Meaningful Activities. The time should involve activities that constitute parenting. Helping with homework, discussing the child’s day, playing games, reading stories, discussing important family matters—these are legitimate parenting activities done virtually.
Adequate Duration. Brief check-in calls probably won’t count as official parenting time. Courts generally expect virtual parenting time blocks to be at least 30 minutes to an hour, depending on the child’s age and circumstances. Younger children might have shorter sessions; older children might have longer ones.
Consistency and Reliability. The arrangement must be sustainable and actually happen. If a custody order specifies virtual parenting time but one parent consistently misses sessions or cancels, that undermines the arrangement.
How Courts Now Evaluate Virtual Time
In determining whether virtual visitation time should count toward custody, courts examine several factors:
The Child’s Age. Very young children (toddlers) may not have the attention span or communication skills for extended virtual visits. School-aged and older children can engage more meaningfully through video. Courts consider developmental appropriateness.
The Nature of the Relationship. A parent who is highly involved in a child’s day-to-day life, even though currently separated or living apart, might have more substantial virtual parenting time. A parent with limited prior involvement will have fewer virtual hours.
The Accessibility of In-Person Time. If both parents live nearby and in-person visits are practical, virtual time supplements them rather than replacing significant portions of custody. If one parent lives far away and in-person visits are infrequent, virtual time becomes more important.
The Technology’s Reliability. Courts consider whether technology is accessible to both parents and child. If internet access is unreliable, virtual time might not be dependable.
The Impact on In-Person Time. If incorporating virtual parenting time would reduce in-person visits or physical time with a parent, courts scrutinize this more carefully. Virtual time shouldn’t be used to displace meaningful in-person parenting.
Practical Examples of Virtual Parenting Time
Consider some real-world scenarios:
A parent deployed overseas. Military deployment might make in-person parenting impossible for months. A parent and child could have scheduled video calls—perhaps 30 minutes every other evening and a longer session on weekends. This virtual time, regularly scheduled and genuinely interactive, would count significantly in custody calculations.
A parent with work requiring frequent travel. A parent whose job requires out-of-state travel might have less in-person parenting time but regular virtual time. If the custody order specifies that on travel weeks, the parent has virtual parenting time Tuesday through Thursday and one extended weekend video session, this is now officially recognized parenting time.
A parent living in a different city. A parent might have in-person custody on alternating weekends but structured virtual time during the week—homework help, bedtime routine by video, checking in about the school day. This combination of in-person and virtual time can create meaningful overall contact.
A parent new to a child’s life. A parent seeking to build a relationship might start with virtual parenting time before increasing in-person visits, once a foundation is established.
Technology Requirements and Expectations
When virtual parenting time is part of a custody order, the order should specify some practical details:
The Platform. Which technology will be used? FaceTime, Zoom, Google Meet, WhatsApp? The custody order might specify the platform or allow flexibility.
The Device. Who provides the device the child uses? Usually, the parent with the child present provides the necessary device and internet connection. But orders might specify that a parent provides a tablet or other device used specifically for video calls.
Internet Access. Who ensures reliable internet? Typically, both parents are responsible for having adequate internet connectivity during their parenting time.
Supervision. For younger children, should the other parent be present during video calls? Or should the child be alone with the parent through the screen? Orders can specify supervision expectations.
Time Zone and Schedule. If parents live in different time zones, the order should specify times in a clear way, accounting for both time zones.
Backup Plans. What happens if technology fails? The custody order might specify that if a video call drops, the parent will text to reschedule, or will try calling back within 15 minutes.
Limitations of Virtual Parenting Time
It’s important to be clear-eyed about what virtual parenting time cannot do. It cannot replace physical presence for fundamental parenting tasks:
Physical Care. A parent can’t bathe, feed, clothe, or put a child to bed through a video call. Physical care requires physical presence.
Comfort and Touch. Children need physical comfort—hugs, being held, having their hurts kissed and band-aided. Video can’t provide this.
Extended Presence. A child still needs extended time with each parent, measured in full days or nights, not just hours of video calls.
Shared Activities. While some activities can happen virtually (games, homework help, conversations), other activities require shared physical space—cooking together, playing outdoor sports, going places, shared experiences.
Courts are clear that virtual parenting time supplements but doesn’t replace in-person custody. A custody order might specify both in-person parenting time and virtual parenting time, but the in-person time remains the foundation.
Including Virtual Visitation in Your Custody Order
If you want virtual parenting time included in your custody order, be specific. Don’t just say “the parent will have reasonable virtual visitation.” Instead, specify:
- Days and times
- Duration of each session
- The technology platform
- What happens if someone misses a session
- Backup contact methods
- Any supervision requirements
- How the virtual time relates to in-person time
Clear specifications help everyone understand expectations and make it easier to hold both parents accountable.
When Virtual Time Doesn’t Work
Virtual parenting time isn’t appropriate in every situation. If a parent has a history of using video calls to harass, intimidate, or monitor the child; if mental health or substance abuse issues make virtual interaction unsafe; if the parent has violated parenting orders; or if the child has expressed fear or anxiety about contact with that parent, virtual time might not be included in the custody order.
Courts also consider whether a parent has been involved and engaged. A parent who has had minimal involvement and suddenly wants significant virtual parenting time will face scrutiny about whether this is genuine commitment to the child’s relationship or legal posturing.
Let Hepner & Pagan Modernize Your Custody Order
At Hepner & Pagan, we help families design custody arrangements that work in the real world. Whether that’s incorporating virtual parenting time for a long-distance parent, using technology to reduce conflict between high-conflict co-parents, or building arrangements that combine physical and virtual time, we think through the details that make arrangements actually sustainable.
We prepare aggressively for any litigation your custody case requires, but we also help families find creative solutions that serve everyone’s interests—especially your children’s. Our child-first approach means we think carefully about whether virtual time genuinely serves your children’s wellbeing or whether it’s being used as a substitute for more meaningful in-person connection.
Ready to explore what custody arrangement works best for your family? Reach out to us today at 408-688-9153. We’ll help you understand your options and build a plan that serves your children’s needs.
